UNIVERSITY PARK, PA-– In an effort to further enhance Penn State’s diverse learning environment, a new arts course has been added to the fall 2001 schedule. The course will be entitled “The Social Impact of the Perverted Arts,” and will study how the perverted arts have affected our society.

             This addition is the brainchild of Professor Rainer Coots, who has been trying to get the course added since last spring. “Every college I have seen offers courses concerning the Renaissance, or Impressionism, but the perverted arts cannot be overlooked any longer.” Coots said.

             “We must continue to diversify this campus, which acts to stifle oppressed educational minorities like myself and my colleagues,” Coots explained, “The perverted arts should have an equally respected place as any other art, and this course aims to ensure that.”

Student Aaron Kilker (graduate - art), who describes himself as "very perverted," plans to take the new course in the fall.

             The course will take an appreciative look at such works as “Used Tampon Jesus,” and “The Persistence of My Excretion.” After analyzing several works for artistic merit, their influence on society and other perverted artists will be discussed.

             The Art Department had mixed feelings about endorsing this course, but with new University policy towards mandatory diversity, finally relented to Coots. Department spokesman Matthew Lane said, “We really didn’t want to give that weirdo a class, but he has tenure.” Lane added, “Forced diversity is really hurting us here, proposals have come in for too many classes and we have to approve them all. Ukrainian Transgender Impressionism, Vampire Artists’ In Society, Lesbian Vaginal Printmaking, its almost ridiculous.”

             The forced diversity Lane referred to is Proposition 234 recently passed by the administration. The proposition, nicknamed “Max PC” dictates that any group who feels the brunt of oppression, must be catered to profusely by the administration. The perverted artists are one such community.

             In actuality, the community consists only of Coots and a few disciples. However, continual teasing over their performances has resulted in more privileges and benefits. Coots, said, “We perverted artists have been persecuted for our beliefs for almost a year now. It’s finally time for some changes.”