STATE COLLEGE, PA-- Following the recent success of "Cuntfest", a number of on-campus men's organizations have put together several activities intended to celebrate the desires and emotions of men. Men Stopping Rape, S.T.R.A.I.G.H.T., and all Penn State fraternities will sponsor "Cockfest," which is scheduled for late February.

              The goals of Cockfest are to help men express themselves freely and overcome the oppressiveness of stringent sexual harassment laws.

Cockfest organizers march in a parade held yesterday to help promote the event.

             Tim Koch, coordinator of Cockfest, explained that for far too long, men have been made to feel ashamed of who they are. "Men are so restrained by today's society, they think it's wrong to be self-confident. We hope that Cockfest helps men accept their position of superiority in the world and be proud of their cocks."

              Cockfest is intended to redefine the meaning of the word cock and drop its negative connotation. As Koch elaborated, "words like 'cocky' should be taken as compliments, not as insults. And phrases like 'suck my cock, bitch' have been given an undeserved stigma for entirely too long."

              Following this event, it is hoped that men will be able to freely boast about themselves without fear of repercussions. The main activities scheduled for Cockfest are drinking, watching and playing sports, reading Maxim, and discussing professional wrestling.

              Featured guests that are due to appear include Tim Allen, Adam Carolla, and Jimmy Kimmel. They will lead workshops on how to be more masculine and learn new techniques to harass women. "We hope to learn a lot from these men," said Koch. "They are the pinnacle of what we hope to achieve-- they are proud of being men and are remarkably self-assured."

              In addition, Cockfest will be a catered event, with refreshments provided by the nearby Hooters restaurant. "It just wouldn't be the same unless we were being served food by scantily clad women," said Koch. He went on to add, "sweet ass, tutz!" to a passerby.